Separation

I don't like this. I don't like it one bit.

I'm paying a great deal of attention to my body right now, because if I get sick, I might get Brian sick, and if I do that, then he might get his dad sick. So I don't want to get sick, and if I feel like I am, we have to take the necessary steps right away. In this case, those steps mean separation. I started to feel a little bit sore in my throat. Someone is sick at work, so I may have caught whatever she's got. I told Brian, and since then, he's been staying at his apartment, not here with me.

I miss the little signs that he's in my space. I miss his warmth next to me in bed at night. I miss waking up to him in the morning. I miss greeting him when we get home from our respective jobs.

I know it's the right thing to do, but I don't like it. I don't like it one bit. It's not that I can't live without him, it's that I don't want to.

The interesting thing, though, is that we are making it by ourselves. I think we'll have matured over it in the long run. But in the meantime, it's not a lot of fun to think that you have to stay away from your boyfriend, lest you harm his father. It's scary and hard. The good thing is, Brian's worth every bit of effort I might make in this relationship.